Written by Amber Turner-Brightman
For this interview, I met with the committee of LGBT Society: President Jack; Admin Secretary Niko; Media Officer Riley; Treasurer Edward; Welfare Secretary Nylah; and Events Secretary Jaye. We spoke about navigating university as a queer person, safe spaces, and Ikea plushies.
What is LGBT Society?
Jack: The society is a bit of a safe community and a haven for anyone who is LGBTQ+. What we really do as a society is have get-together events. We have a weekly lunch on Wednesdays, where we all get together and catch up and have dinner, it’s nice. We try to hold lots of different types of events, like a monthly beach barbecue, last year we went to the fun venues in town like Flip Out and Playzone, and we went swimming… We just do lots of stuff together as group. We try to bring everyone together so people can make friends and feel like they’re actually part of a community, feel like they’re part of something bigger than themselves. When I went to uni the first time, I didn’t really have any of that. I felt entirely alone so I didn’t want people here to be put through that.
Niko: It’s worth noting that a lot of our community is mostly online. We have a lot of people who don’t really participate in real life events, they just spend most of their time on our Discord server. They’re very active in the society, just only online, so we do accommodate for them as well. We host game nights, and the voice channels are always open for people to talk in. The server is the greatest thing about the society in my opinion, because it’s just very lovely and active a lot of the time.
Jack: This year we’re looking at getting involved in more activism too. We’re going to be notifying people about parades and protests, and getting people more involved in the pride proceedings this year if we can. Just getting people involved in everything that’s really gay.
Edward: Building on what Jack was saying earlier, the society is a safety net really. A lot of people go to uni and they have no clue, they’re in a completely new city- especially when it comes to international students or people who have to travel multiple hours- they’re in a completely new zone and they don’t know anyone. Most people are pretty good at going out and finding people and making friends, but not everyone is great at that. I think there can be an overlap between the LGBT community and social anxiety, so it’s a really good safety net for people who perhaps aren’t comfortable or capable of making those connections. It’s an easy way of making those connections, having a big group and knowing that people here at least have some common ground. It’s just a nice little bit of security. If you don’t know where to go, just hop on the Discord and chat to someone about whatever the hell you want, because it’s there. And it’s always there, because when we have over 300 members, so there’s always someone awake! It works out quite well.
Niko: We have people who are active at all times of the day, from midday to midnight, and all the hours after that. It’s incredible, honestly.
LGBT Society Committee, 2022
Why did you join the LGBT Society initially, and has it improved your university experience?
Edward: Well, in college there’d been the GSA, the 'Gender Sexuality Acceptance' run by some very cool people- it was the gay club basically. And there wasn’t one of those for me at secondary school, so it was very new for me. I didn’t know what it was or what to expect, so I just kind of went forward and it was great! I made loads of friends there and loads of connections, multiple of which I’m still in contact with and meet up with regularly today. Going to university, even though I knew I’d mostly be talking to people on my course and people I lived with, it was really nice to go ‘hey, why not just insert myself into the community?’ Because I can, and I like making friends and meeting new people, so why not just click into this server of a couple hundred people and if some stick, great! Then, by chance, I’m now helping run it, which wasn’t the plan… but hey! We’re here!
Jack: Yeah, it’s good. I’m glad I managed to get involved with the society, even though in first year it was a bit of a shitheap, I’m glad to be a part of it this and next year. I can really only hope that lots of people are happy with it and enjoying it.
Jaye: I guess with me, I joined because first year was very lonely for me and I just didn’t really make many friends. In second year, I kind of needed more of that social aspect with likeminded people. It took me a while to join, but I ended up joining and it was probably one of the best decisions in my university life.
Riley: To piggyback off of that like-mindedness, I think it’s really important as a trans and non-binary person to have a safe space, because you’re not going to get that in most of the societies. Not everyone is going to understand the struggles and be there for you like the LGBT society will be. In that sort of way, it’s very important for me, and that’s why I decide to join and help out too.
Niko: Same here. Honestly, I didn’t know any trans people until I moved here, because I come from a different country. Obviously, I moved here and I didn’t know anyone, and I have a very similar experience to Jack as well- I joined first year and I didn’t like it, so I left. But then I heard from other people that the society was better now, so I decided to check it out. I don’t regret it for a second. It’s really lovely now, and that’s actually the reason I wanted to get myself involved in it as well. Personally, I didn’t know anyone, and I had just come out a year before my first year here. It was all very new to me and I needed someone to speak to about it. It’s important to me now, and I’m very happy with the society and how it turned out. I’m only hopeful for the following year to be just as great.
Nylah: Just to continue on from that, for me, during first year when I moved here, I was very much in the closet. Halfway through first year I came out and essentially lost most of the friends I had made here, apart from a few. At the time, I hadn’t heard very good things for trans people with regards to the LGBT society, but during my placement year I heard that Jack had taken over, who I knew from before, so I joined the society and I made a lot more friends. Mainly because I lost everyone coming out, joining the society just helped me gain friends and people to talk with again.
Edward: Just to repeat Niko, Nylah, and Jaye’s points- thank you to Jack. I’ve only been here one year so I don’t know what it was like before, but a lot of people I talk to who have been here longer really talk about the breath of fresh air and new life that’s come into the society. So, you know, good on you mate. You’ve really done a good job, so well done!
Jack: [Makes a love heart with his hands].
Jaye: I only joined when Jack took over, so I think Jack’s really saved this society.
Jack: You’ll make me go red.
Why do you think LGBT soc is a necessary space?
Nylah: It’s having people who you know will accept you for the person you are and accept your sexuality. In normal uni life, you might come across people who do not share those views, so having a space where you can be yourself is very freeing.
Niko: Yeah, and a lot of our members are estranged from their families and feel that the society is genuinely their family now. We hold that value as well, and we try to make everyone feel like it’s a space where they can feel at home. I’m sure I’m not the only person who shares this feeling, but some of the people I’ve met in the society have become closer to me than my biological family, and it’s really nice. I think that’s why it’s necessary. A lot of people need that kind of connection- which is quite hard to get in university because everyone is so busy with their own lives, their degrees, and trying to navigate adulthood. A lot of people don’t consider that maybe some people don’t have a family to go back to. I personally know that for myself, especially during the pandemic, I couldn’t go back to my home country a lot of the time. I spent all of the holidays here, so I understand now that it’s more important that my chosen family are here for me. A lot of people take that for granted really. That’s why the society is important.
Jack: Yeah, I think you can’t guarantee this kind of acceptance and safety in many other places in the uni, not unless you really hunt it down. Obviously opening yourself up to new people is always a minefield of risk, but there’s a lot less risk and a lot more acceptance and friendliness in a society like ours. If you need a space to feel more like yourself, and really find ways to express yourself better, I don’t think you’re going to get a lot of opportunities like that elsewhere.
Edward: I feel like that’s something we benefit from, being a larger net. With sports, it’s for one sport specifically, and if you’re in a team it’s because you do that sport and that’s it, which is normally quite a small cone. With this being more a demographic than an activity or a hobby, we’re there as a safety net, and if people don’t know what they’re doing or who to talk to, we’re always there and present. It’s like Niko was saying before, we make a lot of bonds here which are strong, people stay for a while- there are people who have now left uni who are still in the server, and they have a lovely time chatting and engaging with us. It’s just a great old time.
Jaye: It’s almost like a second family at uni. We’re all so close to each other now because we’ve been in the server for so long. You get to know these people so well, and you just know they’re there for you. I think that is why this society is necessary. I think everybody needs people like that in their lives.
What kind of groups and identities are welcome and represented?
Edward: Anyone who’s not a twat really, I think.
Jack: Yeah, anyone who’s not going to come and be a bigot or shill crypto.
Niko: We have so many allies in society as well, who would consider themselves cisgender and heterosexual, but they just admitted they prefer hanging out with queer people because it’s more fun. I’m like, word, have fun then!
Jack: Anyone who’s willing to just come and have a good time really. Anyone who’s willing to come and spend time with us and make friends, not harass us or just be belligerent in any way. If you meet those criteria, then you’re set.
Edward: I’m going to double down on Jack’s ‘no crypto’ statement. That is a hard line.
It’s nice that you mention you have allies in the society too. Do you have any opinions on what they can do to be more active or supportive?
Jack: Spicy take, but I don’t like the word ‘ally’. I think it promotes a real ‘us vs them’ attitude, which I’m not about. It also implies that being an ally is a conscious effort, when really it just means you’re not being a dick and you’re treating us as people. I think if they want to be more effective, just be nice to us in public- if you see someone being harassed, maybe tell them it’s not cool. Don’t put yourself in harm’s way, but treat us like people and be our friends, you know.
Edward: I’d say probably, just repeating what Jack said, do your part. We’re all people and we all have shared responsibilities, you know, engaging with each other. Do your part to make the world a better place, whether that’s got anything to do with LGBTQ+ issues or other kinds of discrimination and bigotry. Just be kind, be consistent, and keep doing what you’re doing!
What kind of events are you planning?
Riley: For our first session on the 23rd of September, we thought we’d steer away from the sort of icebreaker sessions they’ve had in the past, where they just rent out a Union room and do a quiz and you go around in a circle saying your name. We actually wanted to have an event we normally have, which is our barbecue at the beach. We’re going to start off with that because we know it’s really popular, and it’s really easy to just sit down and chill out by the waves and have a good chat. I think it’s really nice for the new students to see the beaches as well.
Jaye: It will also show them the sort of thing we do in our society. Plus, with the barbecue we don’t all just sit in one group, we sometimes sit in separate groups. That will let new students find their own group within our groups, in a way. Seeing where they fit in the society, who they vibe with.
Riley: The week after the Freshers’ Fayre we’re also going to be at the Representation Fayre, which is held also held at the Union. We will be joined by the Portsmouth Pride organisers and a queer group in Portsmouth called Queer All Year. They’re going to be there just to show what other opportunities and communities are in Portsmouth outside of the university. There will be stickers and everything, and opportunities to volunteer for pride, which is coming up for next year. We’ll also be starting up our Fleet lunches again, which are every Wednesday. We’re just doing events which happen a lot, so people get a feel for what we actually do on a regular basis, rather than just something random which doesn’t represent us.
Edward: We have games nights quite often, and like Riley mentioned we have the weekly Fleet lunches which are just a nice catchup, general socialising for people who may not socialise much outside of that. Not very often but we do occasionally have clubbing nights, and in the warmer weeks we do the beach meetups, which are always great fun. It’s just lovely to sit down and get some little barbecues and chill out with good food. The main thing we always look forward to is our Ball.
Jaye: The Ball is what I’m most looking forward to organising because I remember last year’s Ball, and we’re looking to just replicate that in our own way. Obviously having drag hosts- you might even see a new drag queen there (@jayesym)!
Edward: We threw one back in February and it was just a lovely event. As Jaye mentioned we had drag hosts; lots of music; an amazing little piece from Cuban Salsa… Everyone wore whatever they wanted, which is great because a lot of people in our society don’t get the opportunity to wear formal wear or dresses, because many places where it would make sense to wear it aren’t particularly accepting. It’s lovely because we had this little spot in February, when not a lot is going on and when a lot of people feel down, where everyone got dressed up really fancy, and there was face-painting; salsa; drag; music; dancing; and a runway too! It was just glorious. We’re all so looking forward to putting it on again this academic year because it’s just such a great time!
Riley: Just to add, the reason we hold it at the end of February is because it’s the end of LGBTQ history month. Normally we have a lot of history events going on during the month, and it’s a fun way to end it.
Edward: It was a very fun way to end it, it was lovely.
What could a new joiner expect from LGBT soc?
Jaye: Gay.
Niko: You will find out for yourself very soon! I’m kidding, but we have put in a lot of work this year to make sure that people can read everything in the Discord server and navigate it properly. There are a lot of channels, but that’s the good thing about it. There’s a channel for literally everything and you can talk about anything. Outside of the server, again, all of the events are very relaxed, everyone is very open to meeting new people, everyone is really friendly and you never really feel left out. That’s what happened to me when I joined earlier this year. I was really anxious because I didn’t know anyone, and I joined in the middle of the term. But I went to one random house party which wasn’t associated with the society, but a lot of people from the society went, and everything was fine. I found the group of people who were just standing in a circle talking to each other about video games, and I was like, those are my people.
Edward: I’d say obviously it’s different for everyone, and especially depends on what you’re willing to go to and feel comfortable going to. But for me at least, it was just meeting a lot of new people, getting along with a lot of them, and just making loads of connections immediately. Some I decided to pursue more and become much closer friends with and some I didn’t, but that’s fine. It was just being thrust into this vibrant, very active community, and having a bloody good time really!
Jack: New members will have to put up with my dad jokes.
Riley: An obsession with a shark plushie that will grow.
[The conversation derails into a debate about the best Ikea plushie]
Jaye: This. They can expect this.
Why would you encourage people to join LGBT soc?
Niko: The easy answer is, honestly, why not? That is directed towards people who might be second guessing or those who aren’t LGBT and are wondering ‘what am I gonna do there?’ There’s something for everyone! We are a very big society, yet we remain united, and that’s beautiful.
Edward: I would say community. We’re all here, we’re all friends to a degree. Like Niko said, we are a big society, but it still feels very cosy, very integrated, and everyone’s there for you, despite the fact there’s over 300 people. It’s very tight knit, and it’s lovely.
Jaye: I would say join because we’re all here, and we’re all queer.
Jack: We just get up to a lot of fun stuff, it’s really nice to meet new people, and everyone here is really nice. So why not? It’s good shit.
Jaye: I think another reason to join is how diverse our society is, and how that diversity brings us all together.
Nylah: I think essentially if you want a community that accepts you for the person you are, then this is the society for you.
Jack: I do want to piggyback on that diversity point, because I think in a lot of societies where you have a joint activity rather than a joint community, you don’t meet a lot of different people. And I think it really develops you as a person if you get a lot of new perspectives on life, and that just comes from who you talk to. I think if you join another society where the interest is much more tightly focused, you’re going to find a lot of the same people there. Maybe that’s good for the group, but it’s not that good for your development.
Nylah: To continue what Jack said, while we do have multiple friend groups within the society, once there’s an event everyone just hangs out with each other. Everyone is very open to socialise and talk to whoever.
Jaye: Just join us because we’re the best!
Edward: That’s the kind of can-do confidence we’re putting out!
About the Author: Amber Turner-Brightman (they/them)
Hi, I'm Amber, EIC! I'm an MA Journalism student with an undergraduate degree in Politics and International Relations. I'm particularly interested in current affairs and societal trends.